When I was 18

WHEN I WAS 18

Age is not synonymous to being mature. Just because you are growing older does not guarantee that you are becoming mature. I know this is alarming news to some who reach certain ages in their life. Age is literally a number or stage in life. Even the dictionary backs that up. As a noun it is “the time of life at which some particular qualification, power, or capacity arises or rests (the voting age is 18); one of the stages of life; the length of an existence extending from the beginning to any given time (a boy 10 years of age); lifetime; an advanced stage of life”. There is more to the definition. Just look it up in the dictionary. I recently read a quote I like very much, by Groucho Marx, “Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough”. This is so true.

As a verb age is “to become old, show the effects or the characteristics of increasing age; to acquire a desirable quality (as mellowness or ripeness) by standing undisturbed for some time (letting cheese age)”. Guess what? I found another anonymous quote on age I liked, “Age is of no importance unless you are a cheese”. That one is funny.

Cheese leads me to the wine. Does not wine mature as it ages? I am not an expert so just flow with me in my thought process. If I am older, then I am like fine wine. Right? Let us see. The definition of mature as an adjective states, “having completed natural growth and development, ripe; having undergone maturation; having attained a final or desired state (mature wine). Can this process be ruined? Is it automatic? Under proper conditions, a wine will improve as it ages. This has to be however under the right conditions. Just because it is stashed away to grow old will not make it a good mature, delightful wine. “And no one pours new wine into old wineskins. If he does, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the wineskins will be ruined. No, he pours new wine into new wineskins." -- Mark 2:22 NIV,

So just because one gets older, does not mean one automatically matures. Everyone and everything has its timing and place. Watch out for the clichés! Take your time to smell the roses, the coffee, the smelly socks your brother left in the middle of the living room, a baby’s diaper, a fried egg, clay, markers, crayons, Thanksgiving turkey, chocolate, burned rubber, a new car. Experience life! You need the right conditions and the proper things around you to get to the place you want to be. Or do you think you have, “ta-da”, arrived? What are your conditions? What is surrounding you that may hinder a wonderful maturing process? Are you hindering yourself? Are you going too fast and missing a lot of details and aspects that will make you like that fine wine you think you are now. Do not be a “wanna be”. Do you have clarity? Do you have a robust flavor? A good mature wine has a delightful bouquet, color and even texture. Experts can just swirl the wine around in their wine glass and see how special the wine is, or not. If a storm comes swirling into your life would your “texture” withhold the test?

Landmark birthdays are awesome. I have celebrated every one of them with something memorable. I will turn 40 at the end of this year and could remember as if it was yesterday when I was 18. I actually remember Pre-K. But at 18, I thought I knew everything. I felt no one could tell me anything new or different. I thought ”I am an adult now”. At 18, I proclaimed to know everything. When I turned 21, I realized the silly beliefs I held onto were things that held me back in some areas. I had very harmful habits that blinded me. I realized that I did not know everything but I still knew a whole lot more than my parents did. I went to college.

At 25, I experienced owning my own car and having credit and paying off college loans. I had to pay taxes! I realized that my parents were extremely hard working people that did their best to give me what I needed. Having my own bills and responsibilities demonstrated that to me. Then at 30, I saw much of me in my parents. However, that changed when I turned 35 and realized that it was really much of them in me.

At the end of this year when I will be turning 40, concern is for my parents. I want them to retire happy and comfortable. I do not stop praying and thinking on how I can be a blessing to them just like they have been a blessing to me. When I was 18, I thought my parents would never ever “get it”. I thought they did not have a clue. They could never possibly know all the things I did. Nearing 40 I realize, they cannot know everything I know. They know more! They are geniuses who gave me the best advice, the best they could, their heart and their life just so I could sit back now and enjoy them in my life as wine aficionados appreciate the finest of wines.

When I was 18, I thought I was mature. Close to being 40, I am only half way there.