Thursday, February 4, 2016
Doing It Old School
So in addition to my work in my education, part of my personal goals for 2016 is to write short journal jottings every day. I have tried the blogging and my true friends know that I was a dedicated blogger ever since the days of MySpace and Xanga. Who remembers Xanga? Anyway, since being able to have access to social media via my phone, I rarely get on the PC unless it is for work or school. I have written every day for the entire month of January to date. Doing it old school.
Monday, June 9, 2014
I let the busy get to me
So I have not blogged here in a couple of years. I let the busy get to me. I have another blog in WORDPRESS. I mainly opened that one because XANGA was being discontinued. I did not want to lose the thoughts and words I shared in my old XANGA. So I transferred them to WORDPRESS. I am not sure if I will have this as a personal blog and the WORDPRESS as my vocational blog. Gotta figure that one out. However, the reason I am hear now is because my dear friend, an awesome mentee started her blog for the very first time and I want to be able to read and comment. So until later but hopefully not much later.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Friday, January 27, 2012
Why don't you just stop and let Him catch you?
I am feeling so awesome right now. I am so having church right here all by myself as I am reflecting on some thoughts!
Don't pause on the problem play on the possibilities. Don't stare at the obstacles, stand on the opportunities. Do not even worry about what you cannot control; instead worship the Almighty who is definitely in control. Don't dwindle in doubt but dive into determination! Don't sink into you sinfulness but swim the living waters toward salvation.
You can't fall into addiction if you are all about His adoration. And you surely will endure life's pain if you press on through with praise. Yet I must stand corrected. I am not by myself. I am with I am. I am in the company of the Angel of the Lord who defends me and delivers me. He recues me and protects me. So I am not alone.
Do not feel condemned but confess onto the Lord. Surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life. Not some of the days. Not just holidays. Every day. It says it right there in His Word... in the NIV, ESV, NASB, NLT, KJV... you name it is there. Each day of your life He is after you.Why do you keep running? Why don't you just stop and let Him catch you?
Better yet, turn around and run into his arms!
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Happy New Year 2012 to all Feliz Año Nuevo 2012 a todos.
Resolutions, promises, fresh start, start over’s or whatever you want to call it; it happens every New Year. I hope that one of the things on your list or one of your goals is to have a deeper relationship with Jesus. I am not talking about going to church more or reading and praying every day, though those things are very important and necessary. If your heart is seeking to run to God or to reconcile what once was with Him, you are not going to get it with a simple membership to a church nor are you going to get it by visiting occasionally to different places for "variety". You are not going to find it being religious. Chose God first in your heart and then chose a church family and be committed. Because isn't that what a healthy relationship thrives on? Commitment? Grow and learn together. That is my wish and prayer for all of you for 2012 and always. Happy New Year 2012 to all Feliz Año Nuevo 2012 a todos.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Her heart beat through him...
DES MOINES, Iowa — An Iowa couple married for 72 years died holding hands in a Des Moines hospital within 70 minutes of each other last week after a car accident that also injured another couple.
"They're very old-fashioned. They believed in marriage 'til death do you part," Dennis Yeager, the son of Gordon and Norma Yeager, told KCCI.com.
The accident that claimed Gordon, 94, and Norma Yeager, 90, happened Oct. 12, when the couple left their State Center home for a drive shortly after 8 a.m. At the intersection of Highway 30 and Jessup Avenue, just west of Marshalltown, Gordon pulled "away from the stop sign and failed to yield to a westbound vehicle," according to Sgt. Joel Ehler of the Iowa State Patrol.
The driver of the other car, Charles Clapsaddle, 64, of Marshalltown, was unable to stop to avoid a collision, Ehler said. Clapsaddle was treated and released from Marshalltown Medical & Surgical Center, but his wife, Barbara, was reportedly transferred to Methodist Medical Center in Des Moines. A man who identified himself as their son, John, said in a comment published on a story on the Times-Republican website that his mother suffered internal bleeding and a broken neck.
“She is currently stable but remains in the critical care unit,” he wrote. “There will be a long road ahead for her recovery.
Ehler said Yeager was facing pending action by the Iowa Department of Transportation to have his license removed, but citing privacy concerns, said he could release no additional details on what prompted that action.
The Yeagers' children told KCCI.com that their parents never liked being apart ever since Norma Stock married Gordon Yeager on May 26, 1939, in State Center. And they were relieved that the couple was able to spend their last moments together at the intensive care unit of the Marshalltown hospital.
"They brought them in the same room in intensive care and put them together — and they were holding hands in ICU. They were not really responsive," Dennis Yeager told KCCI.com.
Gordon died at 3:38 p.m. surrounded by their family and holding hands with Norma.
"It was really strange, they were holding hands, and dad stopped breathing but I couldn't figure out what was going on because the heart monitor was still going," said Dennis Yeager. "But we were like, he isn't breathing. How does he still have a heart beat? The nurse checked and said that's because they were holding hands and it's going through them. Her heart was beating through him and picking it up."
Norma died at 4:48 p.m., according to KCCI.com.
"Neither one of them would've wanted to be without each other. I couldn't figure out how it was going to work," the Yeagers' daughter Donna Sheets told KCCI.com. "We were very blessed, honestly, that they went this way."
The Yeager’s children said the couple complemented each other.
"Anybody come over — she was the hostess with the mostess. ... The more she did, the more she smiled," Dennis Yeager told KCCI.com. "Dad would be the center of attention, like, 'Wheee look at me,' and mom was like 'get him away from me!' You know we even got a picture like that."
And even though they argued every now and them, "They just loved being together," he said.
"He said 'I have to stick around. I can't go until she does because I have to stay here for her and she would say the same thing,'" he said.
The couple reportedly were holding hands Tuesday at their funeral in their casket. Their family said the plan was to cremate them together and mix their ashes.
Msnbc.com staff, KCCI.com, and the Times-Republican contributed to this report.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/44960859/ns/health-aging/
"They're very old-fashioned. They believed in marriage 'til death do you part," Dennis Yeager, the son of Gordon and Norma Yeager, told KCCI.com.
The accident that claimed Gordon, 94, and Norma Yeager, 90, happened Oct. 12, when the couple left their State Center home for a drive shortly after 8 a.m. At the intersection of Highway 30 and Jessup Avenue, just west of Marshalltown, Gordon pulled "away from the stop sign and failed to yield to a westbound vehicle," according to Sgt. Joel Ehler of the Iowa State Patrol.
The driver of the other car, Charles Clapsaddle, 64, of Marshalltown, was unable to stop to avoid a collision, Ehler said. Clapsaddle was treated and released from Marshalltown Medical & Surgical Center, but his wife, Barbara, was reportedly transferred to Methodist Medical Center in Des Moines. A man who identified himself as their son, John, said in a comment published on a story on the Times-Republican website that his mother suffered internal bleeding and a broken neck.
“She is currently stable but remains in the critical care unit,” he wrote. “There will be a long road ahead for her recovery.
Ehler said Yeager was facing pending action by the Iowa Department of Transportation to have his license removed, but citing privacy concerns, said he could release no additional details on what prompted that action.
The Yeagers' children told KCCI.com that their parents never liked being apart ever since Norma Stock married Gordon Yeager on May 26, 1939, in State Center. And they were relieved that the couple was able to spend their last moments together at the intensive care unit of the Marshalltown hospital.
"They brought them in the same room in intensive care and put them together — and they were holding hands in ICU. They were not really responsive," Dennis Yeager told KCCI.com.
Gordon died at 3:38 p.m. surrounded by their family and holding hands with Norma.
"It was really strange, they were holding hands, and dad stopped breathing but I couldn't figure out what was going on because the heart monitor was still going," said Dennis Yeager. "But we were like, he isn't breathing. How does he still have a heart beat? The nurse checked and said that's because they were holding hands and it's going through them. Her heart was beating through him and picking it up."
Norma died at 4:48 p.m., according to KCCI.com.
"Neither one of them would've wanted to be without each other. I couldn't figure out how it was going to work," the Yeagers' daughter Donna Sheets told KCCI.com. "We were very blessed, honestly, that they went this way."
The Yeager’s children said the couple complemented each other.
"Anybody come over — she was the hostess with the mostess. ... The more she did, the more she smiled," Dennis Yeager told KCCI.com. "Dad would be the center of attention, like, 'Wheee look at me,' and mom was like 'get him away from me!' You know we even got a picture like that."
And even though they argued every now and them, "They just loved being together," he said.
"He said 'I have to stick around. I can't go until she does because I have to stay here for her and she would say the same thing,'" he said.
The couple reportedly were holding hands Tuesday at their funeral in their casket. Their family said the plan was to cremate them together and mix their ashes.
Msnbc.com staff, KCCI.com, and the Times-Republican contributed to this report.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/44960859/ns/health-aging/
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Unappreciated
Anyone who knows me knows that I am a work-a-holic. I will stay extra hours to complete a project or meet a deadline.
I was very angry with my boss because he came to me yesterday inquiring why I was not done with a particular project. I proceeded to tell him the steps of my project and he looked as me as if it was the first I have ever work on a project like this. He was also wondering why the help he got me was not working fast. That has nothing to do with me. I can only account for how I work. Moreover, I have almost years of experience and can do the job blindfold. The situation is that it is a large bulk of work. The only way of doing it is trudging through it until it gets done.
Now if this was the only thing I had to do I may accept his concern. However, I have so many other things to do as well as follow up, date entry and a pile of reports I need to complete that he has piled on my desk.
I actually cried when he placed more work on my desk. He laughed thinking I was joking. I was not at all joking. I stated right then and there as well as emailed him that I am extremely overwhelmed with the amount of work I had to do and with the load I had to catch up. It is as if I am always in catching up mode.
Well as I was explaining to him (in my seeing the glass half-full attitude), that I was happy that we had less than a 1/4 left of work to finish for the project, he looked at me in awe. He wanted to know what was taking so long. I said all that I already mentioned and added that my work can only go as fast as my hands type and that is pretty fast. I had to look away and started to cry. I literally cried from 5pm until 10pm that I walk out of that office.
Yes! I stayed anyway. I do not run away from hard work and I do what it takes to get it done. Yet, they do not see what I do. I have so much work it is ridiculous. I have so much work that you can create a new position to tackle a third of the work that I do and this person will be busy all day.
I also take trips to the post office to ensure that my postage and packaging is done correctly. That way I will not run into the issue of getting a returned package. I thought taking that extra step to get the job done was honored. Instead, I get disappointed looks. It really makes me feel unappreciated.
I love my job. I would not change it unless GOD sends me into a different direction. In the meantime, I stay put. The funny this is that everyone has suggestion on how I can do my job better or faster but no one is willing to stay and do the grunt work with me. Well, almost no one. One of my co-workers from a completely and unrelated department, stayed with me one evening until 8pm copying over 500 pieces of documents. You know what that means. Filing all of those 500 pieces of documentation.
I have had a helper as I mentioned assigned to me by my superior. She is a great help but she works so slow. I have to help her to speedy up the portion she is assigned to do. By herself, she only stuffed less than 50 envelops. When I helped her, we did over 300. On my own, I do about 100 to 150. This defeats the whole purpose of getting a helper to relieve me to do the other multiple projects I need to get done.
I have a great boss. He does listen to me. However, he sometimes does not get it. He really does not get it. I do not know how much harder I can work. I am just one person. For the record, he was not nasty at all. He is always very respectful and careful with his words. He is as I am; frustrated because we really want and more so need to have things done yesterday. I know that he shares, to a certain extent my frustration. There are things, however, that can only do in the office. Therefore, I have to pull away from whatever is "priority" to handle it. In most cases it a phone call with an inquiry that is very important to handle. One phone call can take about 15 minutes to solve. This is not including the follow up calls. So multiply that to a minimum of 5 calls. It is usually more. This would be a minimum of 25 minutes. Let us add to the list of things I am responsible. On the other hand, let us not.
The whole gist of this bog is that I do not mind at all being overworked and underpaid. I enjoy my work. I do not like being misunderstood or worse, unappreciated.
I was very angry with my boss because he came to me yesterday inquiring why I was not done with a particular project. I proceeded to tell him the steps of my project and he looked as me as if it was the first I have ever work on a project like this. He was also wondering why the help he got me was not working fast. That has nothing to do with me. I can only account for how I work. Moreover, I have almost years of experience and can do the job blindfold. The situation is that it is a large bulk of work. The only way of doing it is trudging through it until it gets done.
Now if this was the only thing I had to do I may accept his concern. However, I have so many other things to do as well as follow up, date entry and a pile of reports I need to complete that he has piled on my desk.
I actually cried when he placed more work on my desk. He laughed thinking I was joking. I was not at all joking. I stated right then and there as well as emailed him that I am extremely overwhelmed with the amount of work I had to do and with the load I had to catch up. It is as if I am always in catching up mode.
Well as I was explaining to him (in my seeing the glass half-full attitude), that I was happy that we had less than a 1/4 left of work to finish for the project, he looked at me in awe. He wanted to know what was taking so long. I said all that I already mentioned and added that my work can only go as fast as my hands type and that is pretty fast. I had to look away and started to cry. I literally cried from 5pm until 10pm that I walk out of that office.
Yes! I stayed anyway. I do not run away from hard work and I do what it takes to get it done. Yet, they do not see what I do. I have so much work it is ridiculous. I have so much work that you can create a new position to tackle a third of the work that I do and this person will be busy all day.
I also take trips to the post office to ensure that my postage and packaging is done correctly. That way I will not run into the issue of getting a returned package. I thought taking that extra step to get the job done was honored. Instead, I get disappointed looks. It really makes me feel unappreciated.
I love my job. I would not change it unless GOD sends me into a different direction. In the meantime, I stay put. The funny this is that everyone has suggestion on how I can do my job better or faster but no one is willing to stay and do the grunt work with me. Well, almost no one. One of my co-workers from a completely and unrelated department, stayed with me one evening until 8pm copying over 500 pieces of documents. You know what that means. Filing all of those 500 pieces of documentation.
I have had a helper as I mentioned assigned to me by my superior. She is a great help but she works so slow. I have to help her to speedy up the portion she is assigned to do. By herself, she only stuffed less than 50 envelops. When I helped her, we did over 300. On my own, I do about 100 to 150. This defeats the whole purpose of getting a helper to relieve me to do the other multiple projects I need to get done.
I have a great boss. He does listen to me. However, he sometimes does not get it. He really does not get it. I do not know how much harder I can work. I am just one person. For the record, he was not nasty at all. He is always very respectful and careful with his words. He is as I am; frustrated because we really want and more so need to have things done yesterday. I know that he shares, to a certain extent my frustration. There are things, however, that can only do in the office. Therefore, I have to pull away from whatever is "priority" to handle it. In most cases it a phone call with an inquiry that is very important to handle. One phone call can take about 15 minutes to solve. This is not including the follow up calls. So multiply that to a minimum of 5 calls. It is usually more. This would be a minimum of 25 minutes. Let us add to the list of things I am responsible. On the other hand, let us not.
The whole gist of this bog is that I do not mind at all being overworked and underpaid. I enjoy my work. I do not like being misunderstood or worse, unappreciated.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Full circle... full circle, revisited
I was commenting to a friend a few weeks ago that about each decade and/or landmark birthday I become much more reflective on my journey in life. I also contemplate on this road trip when impacting things, awesome or adverse, affect my course. It is a moment where you need to stop and re-read your directions, look at the map again, stop at a gasoline station to for help or reprogram your GPS to reroute the trip. Yes, there are always stops and bumps, twists and turns and bridges to cross.
The "Full circle... full circle" blog was originally written in January of 2005. I reposted it in December of 2008. Here we are right dab smack in the middle of January 2011 and I am found with it again:
Now if you look back and you find yourself in the same place... do something about it. (However, what if you are tired of doing something about it. Why doesn't anyone else do something? I read my friend Debb's blog and read her reflection on Jesus’ anguish at the Garden of Gethsemane. His closest to His heart were not present for Him when He needed them most. He literally had to face death on His own. Job stated that he came to this world with nothing and he will leave this world with nothing. The Lord knows how we feel). No need or time or place to feel sorry for yourself EVER... Look back and (be) able to say "YES! I made it and look how high I have climbed" then great. "Full circle... full circle…”
What if I climbed and tripped and I fall to the valley. What if I became scared and hid in the nook of a cliff? What if I cannot take another step because I have no more strength? What if I do not want to fight the good fight? What if I do not want to run the race?
Would it be so bad to travel half way round the circle? Then that would be a journey lost.
The "Full circle... full circle" blog was originally written in January of 2005. I reposted it in December of 2008. Here we are right dab smack in the middle of January 2011 and I am found with it again:
Now if you look back and you find yourself in the same place... do something about it. (However, what if you are tired of doing something about it. Why doesn't anyone else do something? I read my friend Debb's blog and read her reflection on Jesus’ anguish at the Garden of Gethsemane. His closest to His heart were not present for Him when He needed them most. He literally had to face death on His own. Job stated that he came to this world with nothing and he will leave this world with nothing. The Lord knows how we feel). No need or time or place to feel sorry for yourself EVER... Look back and (be) able to say "YES! I made it and look how high I have climbed" then great. "Full circle... full circle…”
Funny how life comes to a full circle... how at a point in time you (were) so hurt by the most unexpected... People who called themselves friend do to you horrible and uncompassionate things. (Sometimes not so horrible but questionable. Makes you distrust simple "good" intentions). You think you are never going to heal let alone get up from the beat down they gave you (or secrets they kept). We have to be honest. There are moments that hurt so bad that you really think you are never going to (get over it). You feel like that kick in your gut will remain forever. Nevertheless, the saying holds true. Time does heal all wounds. Isn't that amazing?
What if I climbed and tripped and I fall to the valley. What if I became scared and hid in the nook of a cliff? What if I cannot take another step because I have no more strength? What if I do not want to fight the good fight? What if I do not want to run the race?
Would it be so bad to travel half way round the circle? Then that would be a journey lost.
Friday, December 17, 2010
Frosty said, "I CAN SEE, I CAN SEE!!!"
I saw an E-Card back in 2005 and posted it then and again in 2007 on MySpace. It is one of my favorite E-Cards. This was the cutest thing. In the background it had a whimsical Christmas tune. The main character of this animated E-Card was Frosty the Snowman.
With much enthusiasm, he rushed to his stocking to see what Santa left in his stocking. He was immediately disappointed to feel two lumps of coal. And yep! He remarked in a complaining tone, "?!?! Two lumps of coal... TWO LUMPS OF COAL?!?!" Then Frosty got the bright idea to take the two lumps of coal and placed them on his face. He became excited and exclaimed, "I CAN SEE, I CAN SEE!"
Such is life. If you get something in life like lumps of coal in the guise of trials or certain circumstances you did NOT ask for, do what Frosty did in this fictional situation... take those things and use them to SEE what exactly is that GOD wants you to see. You'll be surprised as to the protection, love and blessings you will witness if you only press on beyond the surface and into to the deeper understanding of the events in your life.
Remember not only in Christmas but every moment in your life that, "For God so loved the world that he gave His only Begotten son that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have, everlasting life". If that is not the best gift ever, I do not know what is? Jesus gave His life for you! His sole purpose was to leave His throne and be born to then live among us to fulfill His purpose of dying on the cross for us for our salvation. Question arises: Have you given your heart completely to Him? It is literally the only thing Jesus ever wanted for His "Birthday"- your heart.
With much enthusiasm, he rushed to his stocking to see what Santa left in his stocking. He was immediately disappointed to feel two lumps of coal. And yep! He remarked in a complaining tone, "?!?! Two lumps of coal... TWO LUMPS OF COAL?!?!" Then Frosty got the bright idea to take the two lumps of coal and placed them on his face. He became excited and exclaimed, "I CAN SEE, I CAN SEE!"
Such is life. If you get something in life like lumps of coal in the guise of trials or certain circumstances you did NOT ask for, do what Frosty did in this fictional situation... take those things and use them to SEE what exactly is that GOD wants you to see. You'll be surprised as to the protection, love and blessings you will witness if you only press on beyond the surface and into to the deeper understanding of the events in your life.
Remember not only in Christmas but every moment in your life that, "For God so loved the world that he gave His only Begotten son that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have, everlasting life". If that is not the best gift ever, I do not know what is? Jesus gave His life for you! His sole purpose was to leave His throne and be born to then live among us to fulfill His purpose of dying on the cross for us for our salvation. Question arises: Have you given your heart completely to Him? It is literally the only thing Jesus ever wanted for His "Birthday"- your heart.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
FT. MYERS VACATION 2010 - AUG 2 to 5
This is my 3rd day posting a blog/note regarding my vacation. So I missed a few days of writing. I have been sleeping a lot, catching up with television. There is nothing good on TV. I did see an old black and what movie called Pinky. It was an interesting 1949 movie about bi-racial issues. It must have been a bit radical for 1949. I made a flan and my friends liked it. We had it with some delicious Spanish coffee. I received a call from my mommy who missed me. I actually enjoyed that. She was feeling a bit under the weather when I left and I felt bad leaving. She called me to tell me she was feeling much better. Do I still want to move down here and live here for the rest of my life? Absolutely! However, it is not part of His plans in my life (yet). Also my nephews and niece are in Jersey.
I spent the early afternoon on the beach. My feet have to touch the beach at least once a year. The water was very nice and warm. It was a perfect beach day; not too hot, not too humid. The sand was barefoot bearable. I had the best scallops and shrimp lunch at the beach. Abby is so awesome to take me where I want to go while I am here. I am really easy to please. A few hours at the beach are always fine with me. I feel refreshed.
We picked up Abby’s son, niece and nephews. We headed back to the house. We got all clean up and ready for dinner. Abby made one of my favorites… white rice with white beans and chuleta (pork chops, yo). I also got to try a brand new salad dressing; a sun dried tomato vinegarate… yummy. I had me two servings of salad.
I feel well rested.
In a little bit we are going to watch Valentine’s Day and we will see how long the night will last. All I know is that I do not want my vacation to end. Doing nothing and being a little lazy for a week or so is very unusual for an extremely busy and on the go person like me but I welcome it!
Close your eyes with me and feel me smile.
I spent the early afternoon on the beach. My feet have to touch the beach at least once a year. The water was very nice and warm. It was a perfect beach day; not too hot, not too humid. The sand was barefoot bearable. I had the best scallops and shrimp lunch at the beach. Abby is so awesome to take me where I want to go while I am here. I am really easy to please. A few hours at the beach are always fine with me. I feel refreshed.
We picked up Abby’s son, niece and nephews. We headed back to the house. We got all clean up and ready for dinner. Abby made one of my favorites… white rice with white beans and chuleta (pork chops, yo). I also got to try a brand new salad dressing; a sun dried tomato vinegarate… yummy. I had me two servings of salad.
I feel well rested.
In a little bit we are going to watch Valentine’s Day and we will see how long the night will last. All I know is that I do not want my vacation to end. Doing nothing and being a little lazy for a week or so is very unusual for an extremely busy and on the go person like me but I welcome it!
Close your eyes with me and feel me smile.
Monday, August 2, 2010
FT. MYERS VACATION 2010 - AUG 1
OK so it was Sunday and I did not go to church or have to do any chores what-so-ever so I slept in. Abby and her family went to church. I eventually woke up took a nice long shower and got dolled up for just relaxing and doing nothing. This is my favorite kind of vacation.
Anyway I started my vacation blog yesterday. I just knew if anyone was going to enjoy it as much as I was my friend Deb. She gets my writing. There are others who like it to but they keep comments to themselves. So I had a muffin for breakfast and Abby left me coffee and I caught up with email, fixed my luggage, my room and just got nicely settled in. Finally Abby came back from church. Jona her brother came over with his family as well. It was so nice to finally greet him with a hug. I think I am one of the last people to greet him like that for many years of waiting. It is along story but I am finally glad I am no longer waiting and am part of the list of those who have been able to greet him so. EVENTUALLY we have pizza and wings and bread sticks. Then we all went to see INDISPICABLE ME.
We hit the Ice Cream/Candy Parlor afterward. I had a scoop of butter-pecan with a scoop of pistachio nut. I also bought some penny candy by the pound. But it was not a pound.
It was a cute movie. Then we came back, chilled watching part of I-Robot.
I saw Abby’s mom before and after the movies. I was commenting to Abby that each time I come here if feels like I never left. It feels like I have always been here. She told me that she felt the same way too. I am glad that I have her place to just chill and have alone time.
Abby and I talked until we got sleepy revisiting past conversations and memories. So that was day two, Aug 1 of my Ft. Myers vacation.
Anyway I started my vacation blog yesterday. I just knew if anyone was going to enjoy it as much as I was my friend Deb. She gets my writing. There are others who like it to but they keep comments to themselves. So I had a muffin for breakfast and Abby left me coffee and I caught up with email, fixed my luggage, my room and just got nicely settled in. Finally Abby came back from church. Jona her brother came over with his family as well. It was so nice to finally greet him with a hug. I think I am one of the last people to greet him like that for many years of waiting. It is along story but I am finally glad I am no longer waiting and am part of the list of those who have been able to greet him so. EVENTUALLY we have pizza and wings and bread sticks. Then we all went to see INDISPICABLE ME.
We hit the Ice Cream/Candy Parlor afterward. I had a scoop of butter-pecan with a scoop of pistachio nut. I also bought some penny candy by the pound. But it was not a pound.
It was a cute movie. Then we came back, chilled watching part of I-Robot.
I saw Abby’s mom before and after the movies. I was commenting to Abby that each time I come here if feels like I never left. It feels like I have always been here. She told me that she felt the same way too. I am glad that I have her place to just chill and have alone time.
Abby and I talked until we got sleepy revisiting past conversations and memories. So that was day two, Aug 1 of my Ft. Myers vacation.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
FT. MYERS VACATION 2010 - JULY 31
OK so it is August 1 and I am finally in Ft. Myers arriving yesterday. I go every year since I met my friend (little sister born in my heart) Abby, except last year. I went to General Convention in Orlando. There is nothing special here at Ft. Myers except that she is I here and I love Florida. Before talking about some of the things that happened, I want to share my adventurous journey. I was rushing to the airport yesterday. I was on time, so was my sister-in-law Joyce and the nephews. However, I left my cell in my car and dad rode off in it. He had to rush back and give it to me. The boys gave me each something to hold and remember them by during my trip. I need to give it back to them when I come back home. Israel (Bitty) gave me his Pablo from the Back Yardigans toy. Luis (Bubi) gave me his baseball.
We raced to the airport only to find out that my 4pm flight was cancelled to 6pm. All connections were changed as well. Oh well, I have dinner at an airport restaurant. Yeah, 16 bucks for a burger and fries. It was, however, an amazing burger. Like Dora’s backpack would say, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum… delicioso. Do not let anyone in Arizona know I expressed myself in this way. I may get kicked back to my native land, NEW JERSEY.
The 6pm flight was delayed. What a surprise. As I am sitting I make sure I have my driver’s license and boarding pass I realize that it was in row 4. I stared and read the entire ticket and it was row four. It dawned on me that possibly I was bumped up to first class. Last time I was ever in first class was also a last minute bump up. I was a little girl coming back from trip to Puerto Rico with my dad. I felt fancy like a princess back then. I felt like a queen this time around. Every seat had a pillow, blanket and bottle water. The service is like a hotel/restaurant. Now before I continue there are some of you that are thinking, “So what I’ve been in first class before”. Well not me so let me share. Skip to the next paragraph for the rest of the story. They first give you a warm wet towel to wash your hand before eating. NICE! My beverages were in a real glass. I had the choice of a Greek pasta salad or a cob salad wrap. I went for the wrap and that came with a real napkin, fresh fruit salad, a blondie caramel brownie, chips and refills. It was a nice experience.
So we get to Atlanta and I have the nicest woman lead me to my connecting gate. I have a bum knee that sometimes acts up with the arthritis. Some days I am good. It had to hit me at the airport where one walks much to another gate. I got there pain and all. I noticed that in my connecting boarding pass, did not have a seat assigned. I just knew I was not going to be in first class this time. I get to the gate and was assigned the very last seat on the plane, row 38. I was laughing. So it is true, the first shall be last. The only complaint I had was my ears. Not even my tiny bit of arthritis on my knee. My ears always pop at the air pressure during decent. However, in both flights they hurt very bad and did not pop. I actually covered my ears because it hurt so much. It still kept hurting after I got off and this afternoon one ear is still hurting a bit.
Abby picked me up. I love this girl so much. We immediately started to catch up with everything. It continued during our ride and as I unpacked. We were waiting for Benji, her husband, to come back from his mom’s. As routine, Abby made me a welcome basket with stuff that I love. She is the hostess with the most-est. Hotel Abby is the best. Then the best part of the night… I met Benjo. I finally met Abby’s 3 month old son. He was so sleepy but he surely cracked a little smile. Benjo is my new best friend.
We raced to the airport only to find out that my 4pm flight was cancelled to 6pm. All connections were changed as well. Oh well, I have dinner at an airport restaurant. Yeah, 16 bucks for a burger and fries. It was, however, an amazing burger. Like Dora’s backpack would say, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum… delicioso. Do not let anyone in Arizona know I expressed myself in this way. I may get kicked back to my native land, NEW JERSEY.
The 6pm flight was delayed. What a surprise. As I am sitting I make sure I have my driver’s license and boarding pass I realize that it was in row 4. I stared and read the entire ticket and it was row four. It dawned on me that possibly I was bumped up to first class. Last time I was ever in first class was also a last minute bump up. I was a little girl coming back from trip to Puerto Rico with my dad. I felt fancy like a princess back then. I felt like a queen this time around. Every seat had a pillow, blanket and bottle water. The service is like a hotel/restaurant. Now before I continue there are some of you that are thinking, “So what I’ve been in first class before”. Well not me so let me share. Skip to the next paragraph for the rest of the story. They first give you a warm wet towel to wash your hand before eating. NICE! My beverages were in a real glass. I had the choice of a Greek pasta salad or a cob salad wrap. I went for the wrap and that came with a real napkin, fresh fruit salad, a blondie caramel brownie, chips and refills. It was a nice experience.
So we get to Atlanta and I have the nicest woman lead me to my connecting gate. I have a bum knee that sometimes acts up with the arthritis. Some days I am good. It had to hit me at the airport where one walks much to another gate. I got there pain and all. I noticed that in my connecting boarding pass, did not have a seat assigned. I just knew I was not going to be in first class this time. I get to the gate and was assigned the very last seat on the plane, row 38. I was laughing. So it is true, the first shall be last. The only complaint I had was my ears. Not even my tiny bit of arthritis on my knee. My ears always pop at the air pressure during decent. However, in both flights they hurt very bad and did not pop. I actually covered my ears because it hurt so much. It still kept hurting after I got off and this afternoon one ear is still hurting a bit.
Abby picked me up. I love this girl so much. We immediately started to catch up with everything. It continued during our ride and as I unpacked. We were waiting for Benji, her husband, to come back from his mom’s. As routine, Abby made me a welcome basket with stuff that I love. She is the hostess with the most-est. Hotel Abby is the best. Then the best part of the night… I met Benjo. I finally met Abby’s 3 month old son. He was so sleepy but he surely cracked a little smile. Benjo is my new best friend.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
I have no clue why God picked me, loved me.
I have no clue why God picked me, loved me.
I would not pick me. Ha ha ha, I know for a fact there are those out there that would not pick me either. Some because they have a personal thing against me, others because of a silly idea of what a minister of God is suppose to be and yet some who think that it is suppose to be them and not me.
Please, I am not being conceited
or retarded
let alone self righteous....
I seriously do not know, what exactly God has seen in me. He loves me so and guides my life. He prepares blessings for me that are never ending. I have seen His mighty hand not only protect me, but also remove, and even push away those that only wanted to use me..... or worse.... hurt me.
GOD LOVES ME!
WOW!
Can you believe that?
But I am so undeserving.
And I am still learning.
Each day I am searching for His perfect will in my life.
FUNNY! Perfect will? But why the suffering and the pain and the disappointments. Is that.... PERFECT? Or were you getting my attention GOD? I asked if all these trials I was facing worth it. And You reminded me of Job. I asked you why I needed to wrestle with you in prayer. And you told me to look at Jacob. I asked God why are you leading me to pray so much. And He told me to look at Hannah.
I asked Him why me....
and He told me... just wait and see...
I trusted God and I do see, beginning to see. All I see now is birthed from hope. I have now the evidence of what I could not see.
I have no clue why God picked me, loved me.
(c) Saturday, March 04, 2006
I would not pick me. Ha ha ha, I know for a fact there are those out there that would not pick me either. Some because they have a personal thing against me, others because of a silly idea of what a minister of God is suppose to be and yet some who think that it is suppose to be them and not me.
Please, I am not being conceited
or retarded
let alone self righteous....
I seriously do not know, what exactly God has seen in me. He loves me so and guides my life. He prepares blessings for me that are never ending. I have seen His mighty hand not only protect me, but also remove, and even push away those that only wanted to use me..... or worse.... hurt me.
GOD LOVES ME!
WOW!
Can you believe that?
But I am so undeserving.
And I am still learning.
Each day I am searching for His perfect will in my life.
FUNNY! Perfect will? But why the suffering and the pain and the disappointments. Is that.... PERFECT? Or were you getting my attention GOD? I asked if all these trials I was facing worth it. And You reminded me of Job. I asked you why I needed to wrestle with you in prayer. And you told me to look at Jacob. I asked God why are you leading me to pray so much. And He told me to look at Hannah.
I asked Him why me....
and He told me... just wait and see...
I trusted God and I do see, beginning to see. All I see now is birthed from hope. I have now the evidence of what I could not see.
I have no clue why God picked me, loved me.
(c) Saturday, March 04, 2006
Thursday, January 7, 2010
When I was 18
WHEN I WAS 18
Age is not synonymous to being mature. Just because you are growing older does not guarantee that you are becoming mature. I know this is alarming news to some who reach certain ages in their life. Age is literally a number or stage in life. Even the dictionary backs that up. As a noun it is “the time of life at which some particular qualification, power, or capacity arises or rests (the voting age is 18); one of the stages of life; the length of an existence extending from the beginning to any given time (a boy 10 years of age); lifetime; an advanced stage of life”. There is more to the definition. Just look it up in the dictionary. I recently read a quote I like very much, by Groucho Marx, “Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough”. This is so true.
As a verb age is “to become old, show the effects or the characteristics of increasing age; to acquire a desirable quality (as mellowness or ripeness) by standing undisturbed for some time (letting cheese age)”. Guess what? I found another anonymous quote on age I liked, “Age is of no importance unless you are a cheese”. That one is funny.
Cheese leads me to the wine. Does not wine mature as it ages? I am not an expert so just flow with me in my thought process. If I am older, then I am like fine wine. Right? Let us see. The definition of mature as an adjective states, “having completed natural growth and development, ripe; having undergone maturation; having attained a final or desired state (mature wine). Can this process be ruined? Is it automatic? Under proper conditions, a wine will improve as it ages. This has to be however under the right conditions. Just because it is stashed away to grow old will not make it a good mature, delightful wine. “And no one pours new wine into old wineskins. If he does, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the wineskins will be ruined. No, he pours new wine into new wineskins." -- Mark 2:22 NIV,
So just because one gets older, does not mean one automatically matures. Everyone and everything has its timing and place. Watch out for the clichés! Take your time to smell the roses, the coffee, the smelly socks your brother left in the middle of the living room, a baby’s diaper, a fried egg, clay, markers, crayons, Thanksgiving turkey, chocolate, burned rubber, a new car. Experience life! You need the right conditions and the proper things around you to get to the place you want to be. Or do you think you have, “ta-da”, arrived? What are your conditions? What is surrounding you that may hinder a wonderful maturing process? Are you hindering yourself? Are you going too fast and missing a lot of details and aspects that will make you like that fine wine you think you are now. Do not be a “wanna be”. Do you have clarity? Do you have a robust flavor? A good mature wine has a delightful bouquet, color and even texture. Experts can just swirl the wine around in their wine glass and see how special the wine is, or not. If a storm comes swirling into your life would your “texture” withhold the test?
Landmark birthdays are awesome. I have celebrated every one of them with something memorable. I will turn 40 at the end of this year and could remember as if it was yesterday when I was 18. I actually remember Pre-K. But at 18, I thought I knew everything. I felt no one could tell me anything new or different. I thought ”I am an adult now”. At 18, I proclaimed to know everything. When I turned 21, I realized the silly beliefs I held onto were things that held me back in some areas. I had very harmful habits that blinded me. I realized that I did not know everything but I still knew a whole lot more than my parents did. I went to college.
At 25, I experienced owning my own car and having credit and paying off college loans. I had to pay taxes! I realized that my parents were extremely hard working people that did their best to give me what I needed. Having my own bills and responsibilities demonstrated that to me. Then at 30, I saw much of me in my parents. However, that changed when I turned 35 and realized that it was really much of them in me.
At the end of this year when I will be turning 40, concern is for my parents. I want them to retire happy and comfortable. I do not stop praying and thinking on how I can be a blessing to them just like they have been a blessing to me. When I was 18, I thought my parents would never ever “get it”. I thought they did not have a clue. They could never possibly know all the things I did. Nearing 40 I realize, they cannot know everything I know. They know more! They are geniuses who gave me the best advice, the best they could, their heart and their life just so I could sit back now and enjoy them in my life as wine aficionados appreciate the finest of wines.
When I was 18, I thought I was mature. Close to being 40, I am only half way there.
Age is not synonymous to being mature. Just because you are growing older does not guarantee that you are becoming mature. I know this is alarming news to some who reach certain ages in their life. Age is literally a number or stage in life. Even the dictionary backs that up. As a noun it is “the time of life at which some particular qualification, power, or capacity arises or rests (the voting age is 18); one of the stages of life; the length of an existence extending from the beginning to any given time (a boy 10 years of age); lifetime; an advanced stage of life”. There is more to the definition. Just look it up in the dictionary. I recently read a quote I like very much, by Groucho Marx, “Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough”. This is so true.
As a verb age is “to become old, show the effects or the characteristics of increasing age; to acquire a desirable quality (as mellowness or ripeness) by standing undisturbed for some time (letting cheese age)”. Guess what? I found another anonymous quote on age I liked, “Age is of no importance unless you are a cheese”. That one is funny.
Cheese leads me to the wine. Does not wine mature as it ages? I am not an expert so just flow with me in my thought process. If I am older, then I am like fine wine. Right? Let us see. The definition of mature as an adjective states, “having completed natural growth and development, ripe; having undergone maturation; having attained a final or desired state (mature wine). Can this process be ruined? Is it automatic? Under proper conditions, a wine will improve as it ages. This has to be however under the right conditions. Just because it is stashed away to grow old will not make it a good mature, delightful wine. “And no one pours new wine into old wineskins. If he does, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the wineskins will be ruined. No, he pours new wine into new wineskins." -- Mark 2:22 NIV,
So just because one gets older, does not mean one automatically matures. Everyone and everything has its timing and place. Watch out for the clichés! Take your time to smell the roses, the coffee, the smelly socks your brother left in the middle of the living room, a baby’s diaper, a fried egg, clay, markers, crayons, Thanksgiving turkey, chocolate, burned rubber, a new car. Experience life! You need the right conditions and the proper things around you to get to the place you want to be. Or do you think you have, “ta-da”, arrived? What are your conditions? What is surrounding you that may hinder a wonderful maturing process? Are you hindering yourself? Are you going too fast and missing a lot of details and aspects that will make you like that fine wine you think you are now. Do not be a “wanna be”. Do you have clarity? Do you have a robust flavor? A good mature wine has a delightful bouquet, color and even texture. Experts can just swirl the wine around in their wine glass and see how special the wine is, or not. If a storm comes swirling into your life would your “texture” withhold the test?
Landmark birthdays are awesome. I have celebrated every one of them with something memorable. I will turn 40 at the end of this year and could remember as if it was yesterday when I was 18. I actually remember Pre-K. But at 18, I thought I knew everything. I felt no one could tell me anything new or different. I thought ”I am an adult now”. At 18, I proclaimed to know everything. When I turned 21, I realized the silly beliefs I held onto were things that held me back in some areas. I had very harmful habits that blinded me. I realized that I did not know everything but I still knew a whole lot more than my parents did. I went to college.
At 25, I experienced owning my own car and having credit and paying off college loans. I had to pay taxes! I realized that my parents were extremely hard working people that did their best to give me what I needed. Having my own bills and responsibilities demonstrated that to me. Then at 30, I saw much of me in my parents. However, that changed when I turned 35 and realized that it was really much of them in me.
At the end of this year when I will be turning 40, concern is for my parents. I want them to retire happy and comfortable. I do not stop praying and thinking on how I can be a blessing to them just like they have been a blessing to me. When I was 18, I thought my parents would never ever “get it”. I thought they did not have a clue. They could never possibly know all the things I did. Nearing 40 I realize, they cannot know everything I know. They know more! They are geniuses who gave me the best advice, the best they could, their heart and their life just so I could sit back now and enjoy them in my life as wine aficionados appreciate the finest of wines.
When I was 18, I thought I was mature. Close to being 40, I am only half way there.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
411
411 IS UNIVERSALLY KNOWN AS INFORMATION. Well I do not know about the universe but in all of the United States. Right? Well regardless of specific and detailed instructions given to people for information they continue to ask secondary sources. Hypothetically posing an example I could tell someone, I have a tattoo on my butt. They should either believe it or not. Better yet, they should not care. Whatever the reaction it really does not matter. 
You asked information about me that is personal and I gave you the answer. So then, why do you have to go and ask someone else to confirm if I have a tattoo on my butt? Would I have shown them my butt? Would it be personal information they need to know? Are they the best person to ask? So why do it then? You cannot get personal information about me that is true unless it comes from me. You can come close, but close does not cut it.
So why am I venting? What is the real issue? Well first, I just want to say that I do not have a tattoo on my butt. Now that that is out of the way let me express myself. Someone asked me, about the seminary I attend. I told them the basics, “It’s great, I passed all my classes, dream come true”. Cool? OK so the next question is "What do I have to do to enroll"? Therefore, I give them the direct contact person and their information. I give them… should I say it, should I… DETAILS! I give them details, the name of the person, when they will return to the office after the holidays, the telephone number, the extension number, the email address, the website, the address of the school. This direct contact knows the ins and outs of the entire program. The recipient of this information presses on with more questions like, “How do I register”. I said, “Oh the contact person can give you all that good information. Since it is a special admissions process and it is mid-way the academic year, he would be the best person to ask”.
Is this the end? Unfortunately, no. The drama continues. I am CRAZY busy at work. Moreover, anyone who has ever seen me at work or even come to volunteer and help me knows I am not exaggerating. This person who I gave the information to calls my extension to transfer a call to inquire about the seminary. Really? Really. I have million papers to push and now I am the direct 411 to this seminary. FOR CRYING OUTLOUD! This young man asks me nicely about the program. Therefore, I responded verbatim with the name of the person, when they will return to the office after the holidays, the telephone number, the extension number, the email address, the website, the address of the school. They sounded disappointed. What? Was I supposed to tell them what the real contact person expertly knows? So this is the end of the story, right?
No, it is not! The same person asks me why I did not give this young man the information. I stated in the calmest voice that I could because by this time I was aggravated. I said that I gave the BEST most DETAILED information I could possible give because the person I referred them to had all the 411 on the program, on tuition, on registration and everything. The person looked at me as if I had a third eye and told me that someone else told her that I was the best contact. I said, ‘I do not work for the seminary. I am just a student”. Which by the way, I have passed with almost straight A’s. I say almost because one grade was an A-.
So where was I? Oh yes, I stated to the person that I sincerely gave all the 411. Then she speaks to me in an aggravated voice to me. TO ME! She questioned as to why the person was not calling her back. How the heck should I know? However, if you have been paying attention to this narrative and you have great reading comprehension, you have realized that in my DETAILS I did state that the person is AWAY for the holiday. I do not know about you, but when I am on vacation, I speak to no one but room service.
Another thing that I know will bother me, I feel it with much anxiety, is if any tiny bit of information I say does not coincided with information from the contact person the inquiring mind will say, “But Letty said”. I hate this. I hate this possibly more than assumptions. I freely gave the right contact information to the REAL 411 connection. USE IT!
One last exaggerated example that just popped into my head and I will hate myself if I do not use it. Let us say, hypothetically, again, someone asked me, “Where can I find Salvation”? Well duh, I am going to tell that person, “Jesus” and I will point the way and even give them some written instructions (the Bible). This person seeking salvation will then ask me,” So how did you get saved?” So, I REPEAT the same answer. They respond, “OK so how can I get saved?” I say, “Ummm I just told you…. Jesus… He is the way the truth and the life”. “Yeah cool, but I was told that you had the 411”. “Yes, I just gave it to you. Now take a step of faith and go to Him”. “So did it cost you anything”? “No, it is free”. “Yeah but you are telling me this and I am still not saved”. “…because you have to G-O, go T-O, tooooooooooooo HHHIIIMMM”.
So what is the moral in this blog? I do not have a tattoo on my butt. I am not anyone’s personal 411. I can only share information I have to help you. Use the information given to proceed on with the desires in your life. I can and will not do it for you. Finally, I am just the messenger. Go to the main source. Jesus is the one who saves.
You asked information about me that is personal and I gave you the answer. So then, why do you have to go and ask someone else to confirm if I have a tattoo on my butt? Would I have shown them my butt? Would it be personal information they need to know? Are they the best person to ask? So why do it then? You cannot get personal information about me that is true unless it comes from me. You can come close, but close does not cut it.So why am I venting? What is the real issue? Well first, I just want to say that I do not have a tattoo on my butt. Now that that is out of the way let me express myself. Someone asked me, about the seminary I attend. I told them the basics, “It’s great, I passed all my classes, dream come true”. Cool? OK so the next question is "What do I have to do to enroll"? Therefore, I give them the direct contact person and their information. I give them… should I say it, should I… DETAILS! I give them details, the name of the person, when they will return to the office after the holidays, the telephone number, the extension number, the email address, the website, the address of the school. This direct contact knows the ins and outs of the entire program. The recipient of this information presses on with more questions like, “How do I register”. I said, “Oh the contact person can give you all that good information. Since it is a special admissions process and it is mid-way the academic year, he would be the best person to ask”.
Is this the end? Unfortunately, no. The drama continues. I am CRAZY busy at work. Moreover, anyone who has ever seen me at work or even come to volunteer and help me knows I am not exaggerating. This person who I gave the information to calls my extension to transfer a call to inquire about the seminary. Really? Really. I have million papers to push and now I am the direct 411 to this seminary. FOR CRYING OUTLOUD! This young man asks me nicely about the program. Therefore, I responded verbatim with the name of the person, when they will return to the office after the holidays, the telephone number, the extension number, the email address, the website, the address of the school. They sounded disappointed. What? Was I supposed to tell them what the real contact person expertly knows? So this is the end of the story, right?
No, it is not! The same person asks me why I did not give this young man the information. I stated in the calmest voice that I could because by this time I was aggravated. I said that I gave the BEST most DETAILED information I could possible give because the person I referred them to had all the 411 on the program, on tuition, on registration and everything. The person looked at me as if I had a third eye and told me that someone else told her that I was the best contact. I said, ‘I do not work for the seminary. I am just a student”. Which by the way, I have passed with almost straight A’s. I say almost because one grade was an A-.
So where was I? Oh yes, I stated to the person that I sincerely gave all the 411. Then she speaks to me in an aggravated voice to me. TO ME! She questioned as to why the person was not calling her back. How the heck should I know? However, if you have been paying attention to this narrative and you have great reading comprehension, you have realized that in my DETAILS I did state that the person is AWAY for the holiday. I do not know about you, but when I am on vacation, I speak to no one but room service.
Another thing that I know will bother me, I feel it with much anxiety, is if any tiny bit of information I say does not coincided with information from the contact person the inquiring mind will say, “But Letty said”. I hate this. I hate this possibly more than assumptions. I freely gave the right contact information to the REAL 411 connection. USE IT!
One last exaggerated example that just popped into my head and I will hate myself if I do not use it. Let us say, hypothetically, again, someone asked me, “Where can I find Salvation”? Well duh, I am going to tell that person, “Jesus” and I will point the way and even give them some written instructions (the Bible). This person seeking salvation will then ask me,” So how did you get saved?” So, I REPEAT the same answer. They respond, “OK so how can I get saved?” I say, “Ummm I just told you…. Jesus… He is the way the truth and the life”. “Yeah cool, but I was told that you had the 411”. “Yes, I just gave it to you. Now take a step of faith and go to Him”. “So did it cost you anything”? “No, it is free”. “Yeah but you are telling me this and I am still not saved”. “…because you have to G-O, go T-O, tooooooooooooo HHHIIIMMM”.
So what is the moral in this blog? I do not have a tattoo on my butt. I am not anyone’s personal 411. I can only share information I have to help you. Use the information given to proceed on with the desires in your life. I can and will not do it for you. Finally, I am just the messenger. Go to the main source. Jesus is the one who saves.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
he is so beautiful
he is so beautiful
but i did not see it until i closed my eyes and all
and i heard him pray with words celestial
not with worry not tempermental
not that the outside is not fine
but the inside was close to divine
for what is housed in his heart
was observed almost like art
it came to me a masterpiece starting
as a plate with paint filled pegs sparkling
on a summer day a mushy hot mess
to see it transform after a brush stroke and guess
into reality something i saw with my soul
a mature old soul
mecifully placed
in an empty young rebellious case
you were stopped at the moment
you thought your goals were being kept
but when you decided to take things into
your own hands and present you to
the world, God squeezed your heart and you fell
only to have Him lift you up and you could tell
you knew fairly well
that you were protected from the gates of hell
he is quite special and has been touched
by the Almighty Father and pretty much
nothing will stop him
except him
he cannot stop
and should not stop
because he has come too far now
to even question how
God has taken him so far
and from his past placed afar
to the spiritually discerned the beauty within
outshines and wins
the beauty from out
that without a doubt
is there
but where
does it fit in the scheme
of his life in the scene
of the moment
i saw with my eyes, shut and all
that he is so beautiful
(c)November 21, 2007 / Leticia Soto
but i did not see it until i closed my eyes and all
and i heard him pray with words celestial
not with worry not tempermental
not that the outside is not fine
but the inside was close to divine
for what is housed in his heart
was observed almost like art
it came to me a masterpiece starting
as a plate with paint filled pegs sparkling
on a summer day a mushy hot mess
to see it transform after a brush stroke and guess
into reality something i saw with my soul
a mature old soul
mecifully placed
in an empty young rebellious case
you were stopped at the moment
you thought your goals were being kept
but when you decided to take things into
your own hands and present you to
the world, God squeezed your heart and you fell
only to have Him lift you up and you could tell
you knew fairly well
that you were protected from the gates of hell
he is quite special and has been touched
by the Almighty Father and pretty much
nothing will stop him
except him
he cannot stop
and should not stop
because he has come too far now
to even question how
God has taken him so far
and from his past placed afar
to the spiritually discerned the beauty within
outshines and wins
the beauty from out
that without a doubt
is there
but where
does it fit in the scheme
of his life in the scene
of the moment
i saw with my eyes, shut and all
that he is so beautiful
(c)November 21, 2007 / Leticia Soto
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Get A Clue!
I wish people would get a clue. I mean if you are cut off and have never been added again, then hello that means I do not want you to have any part in my life. I mean come on! I do not respond to any means of you trying to communicate with me. So why do you insist on trying to involve yourself back in my life? You bacame toxic in my life and I could not breathe. The funny thing is that I did not realize this until you were the one who pulled the plug on me. I never pulled it. You did. So deal with your decision. I noticed that I was able to breathe on my own and that I was your life support. You sucked me dry of all my energies like a leech.
The past was nice and there are good memories, but that is just it. It is only a good memory. I can't say that I have anything else nor would I want to. What does it take for you to get a clue? I get the clue! Of course I do not like to assume and I rather have people tell me that they are cutting me off than finding out via other means (like just dropping me and never telling me what you are mad about or me trying to figure it out by myself). However, once I figured it out, I kept my distance and moved on. It hurt, yes but it did not kill me.
So that is all I ask. I want you to leave me the heck alone and stop trying to be nice. I do not want you to be nice. Just be you. Let me be just me.
For the record, I do not hate you. Not at all. I love God and myself and my salvation too much to lose any of it because of a bitter root. No. I still love you in the Lord and only wish you the best. However, I have a scar of a healed wound caused by you that is a constant reminder that I should not "go there". So I will not "go there". It is that simple. And don't give me that mumbo jumbo about being a Christian. Paul is one of the greatest examples I love in the bible. He had a very close relationship with the Lord. However he and Barnabas did not see eye to eye and they had to part ways. They dealt with each other later on after time passed but it was never the same as it was in the beginning.
So do not go there. Do not bother yourself in telling me how happy you are for me. I am really not interested. Sounds cold? Well to a certain extent it is cold. Your caring is not really a priority in my list. It is really not important for me to know because wether you do or you don't makes no impact in my life. Life goes on and so should you.
If I see you I most like will say, "Well hello. Nice seeing you again. Hope is well and take care. Bye". That is it. There will be no coffee or lunch date. That no longer will benefit us.
You became toxic and I wanted to live. Too bad that cutting you off was the end result. Again, life goes on and so should you.
The past was nice and there are good memories, but that is just it. It is only a good memory. I can't say that I have anything else nor would I want to. What does it take for you to get a clue? I get the clue! Of course I do not like to assume and I rather have people tell me that they are cutting me off than finding out via other means (like just dropping me and never telling me what you are mad about or me trying to figure it out by myself). However, once I figured it out, I kept my distance and moved on. It hurt, yes but it did not kill me.
So that is all I ask. I want you to leave me the heck alone and stop trying to be nice. I do not want you to be nice. Just be you. Let me be just me.
For the record, I do not hate you. Not at all. I love God and myself and my salvation too much to lose any of it because of a bitter root. No. I still love you in the Lord and only wish you the best. However, I have a scar of a healed wound caused by you that is a constant reminder that I should not "go there". So I will not "go there". It is that simple. And don't give me that mumbo jumbo about being a Christian. Paul is one of the greatest examples I love in the bible. He had a very close relationship with the Lord. However he and Barnabas did not see eye to eye and they had to part ways. They dealt with each other later on after time passed but it was never the same as it was in the beginning.
So do not go there. Do not bother yourself in telling me how happy you are for me. I am really not interested. Sounds cold? Well to a certain extent it is cold. Your caring is not really a priority in my list. It is really not important for me to know because wether you do or you don't makes no impact in my life. Life goes on and so should you.
If I see you I most like will say, "Well hello. Nice seeing you again. Hope is well and take care. Bye". That is it. There will be no coffee or lunch date. That no longer will benefit us.
You became toxic and I wanted to live. Too bad that cutting you off was the end result. Again, life goes on and so should you.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
I love you in a place where there's no space or time. I love you for in my life you are a friend of mine.
Donny Hathaway - A Song for You
A Song For You (Live @ The Troubador, Los Angeles, CA) - Donny Hathaway
I've been so many places in my life and time
I've sung a lot of songs I've made some bad rhyme
I've acted out my love in stages
With ten thousand people watching
But we're alone now and I'm singing this song for you
I know your image of me is what I hope to be
I've treated you unkindly but darlin' can't you see
There's no one more important to me
Darlin' can't you please see through me
Cause we're alone now and I'm singing this song for you
You taught me precious secrets of the truth witholding nothing
You came out in front and I was hiding
But now I'm so much better and if my words don't come together
Listen to the melody cause my love is in there hiding
I love you in a place where there's no space or time
I love you for in my life you are a friend of mine
And when my life is over
Remember when we were together
We were alone and I was singing this song for you
You taught me precious secrets of the truth witholding nothing
You came out in front and I was hiding
But now I'm so much better and if my words don't come together
Listen to the melody cause my love is in there hiding
I love you in a place where there's no space or time
I love you for in my life you are a friend of mine
And when my life is over
Remember when we were together
We were alone and I was singing this song for you
We were alone and I was singing this song for you
A Song For You (Live @ The Troubador, Los Angeles, CA) - Donny Hathaway
I've been so many places in my life and time
I've sung a lot of songs I've made some bad rhyme
I've acted out my love in stages
With ten thousand people watching
But we're alone now and I'm singing this song for you
I know your image of me is what I hope to be
I've treated you unkindly but darlin' can't you see
There's no one more important to me
Darlin' can't you please see through me
Cause we're alone now and I'm singing this song for you
You taught me precious secrets of the truth witholding nothing
You came out in front and I was hiding
But now I'm so much better and if my words don't come together
Listen to the melody cause my love is in there hiding
I love you in a place where there's no space or time
I love you for in my life you are a friend of mine
And when my life is over
Remember when we were together
We were alone and I was singing this song for you
You taught me precious secrets of the truth witholding nothing
You came out in front and I was hiding
But now I'm so much better and if my words don't come together
Listen to the melody cause my love is in there hiding
I love you in a place where there's no space or time
I love you for in my life you are a friend of mine
And when my life is over
Remember when we were together
We were alone and I was singing this song for you
We were alone and I was singing this song for you
Saturday, August 29, 2009
I am still not perfect. Yet I am most definitely experiencing GRACE.
One of my dear friends texted me one morning, "the true test of character is not how much we know how to do, but how we behave when we don’t know what to do".
I have always told my youth in my church and ones that I have worked with that most of the time I am pretty focused under pressure. Note I said most of the time. So don’t be getting your duff in a fluff because I took care of that already; I know that we are not all perfect. I wrote in a different blog, “Wall Flower”. I may post it here too so you can further understand what I mean. Anyway, I'm free stylin’ again. Scrolling through my text messages saw the quote and "pow" inspiration to just write down my thoughts.
So back to the quote. I like it and it is true. Why did I mention my church group? Well a bunch of us were in a car going to the Bronx. I for once was not driving - woo hoo! I drive but I hate driving. Too many people have taken advantage of my kindness, car and driving, Anyway, “Geez, girl stay on the topic”, the quote.
We stopped at Dunkin Donuts first to get coffee. Well the driver did. I stayed in the car with the others. I wanted to put my seat straight up (I had shot-gun) because I hate it when it is leaning a bit back. I can’t tell if I am sitting or lying down and the uncertainty goes against all manners of just relaxing and enjoying the ride. So one of my younger jovenes helped me. It was a big project. I had to open my door, pull here, pull there, adjust and finally the seat was at the perfect angle (or not) that made me feel like we were going for a nice ride. The young person closes the door and an immense pain and rush of blood ran to the tip of my ring and middle finger. I had huge drops of tears rolling down my face as I stated in a slow and extremely articulated voice, "open the door quickly, and open the door now". The kid eventually heard me and as she opened the door she and another person was screaming to the top of their lungs as if their fingers were being crushed. The 4th person almost passed out. After the scare, the wiping of my tears and the driver returning, all was quite.
All of a sudden the person who screamed the loudest stated, "Letty I saw in your face that you were in extreme pain but you stayed calm and did not yell". I started to laugh. The kid who crushed my fingers kept saying, "I am so sorry, I am so sorry". The other person who almost passed out stated, "WOW, talk about calm in the midst of trial". Again I was cracking up. I told them I was in a lot of pain and that I all I wanted was my fingers to be free. Determination was my ammunition. That my message would get across was life or death. Talk about grace under pressure. If anyone has ever had their hand slammed with a car door, you surely understand that pressure -- literally.
Side note: my nails did not turn black and despite the slight tenderness in the fingers, I am fine and my nails look cute.
This reminded me of when my dad had a stroke while we were on vacation a few years back. I saw my dad sick and just said to him in a calm analytical voice, “Papi, I think you are having a stroke". But he could not talk and right before my eyes his mouth twisted down to the side and his arm got stiff. Then off course you know the running to the hospital and finding one near a beach resort is not that easy. When I got there I went straight to the window just to be pulled by a loud Jamaican lady cursing up a storm claiming that I cut her in “de line”. I let her scream as the in-take clerk observed. She was ranting and raving on how she had an emergency and that she was there first and I waited until she was done. When she was done I asked the clerk if I could speak and she nodded. I said in the most (again) articulate and slow speech, "My dad is in the middle of a stroke". I saw that clerk fly out of her chair and immediately place my dad on a stretcher as he was rolled into the emergency care area. I am glad I was there for my father.
Lesson: you get more flies with honey than with vinegar. A stroke is of the utmost importance, so you need to get that message across loud and clear.
I had my character attacked at different stages of my life. I think we all go through that. However, there was one time in my life that it was attacked so unjustly and so cruel. It was like a blow you never saw coming and it knocked the wind out of you. This punch was so hard that I lost ALL trust in fellow man. Assumptions and lies and rumors and such things definitely fade away when they are so stretched from reality. The other day I found this quote. Note sure who said it but here it goes, “Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are”.
When the smoke clears you can see everything. After a storm hits you see the debris on the beach. Though there is no more smoke and the garbage is cleaned up, you still feel a sense of need to yell at the top of your lungs, "I told you so! I told you so". But deep in your heart you feel the tug of God telling you "be still and know that I am". But you want to say something. You do not want to seem like a punk. The Holy Spirit brings to remembrance the biblical concepts and truth that He fights all of our battles and that He is like a mighty giant beside us fight along our side in each battle. You remember that the scripture states that He pulls you out of the miry clay (rumors), out of the deep pit (lies) and cleans you up and places you upon the rock (JESUS). God is the one who places a new song in our mouth and through that testimony, not your words or defense or debate or explanation or reasoning, but the testimony that God makes you experience, will be seen by many and lead them to come and truly know God and fear Him.
I sincerely did not know what to do in each case. I never had my fingers slammed. I never have seen a person go through a stroke. I never saw that storm come - it just hit. Yet, with God’s help I was able to behave in a manner that led me to figure out what to do (and what NOT to do).
I am still not perfect. Yet I am most definitely experiencing GRACE.
I have always told my youth in my church and ones that I have worked with that most of the time I am pretty focused under pressure. Note I said most of the time. So don’t be getting your duff in a fluff because I took care of that already; I know that we are not all perfect. I wrote in a different blog, “Wall Flower”. I may post it here too so you can further understand what I mean. Anyway, I'm free stylin’ again. Scrolling through my text messages saw the quote and "pow" inspiration to just write down my thoughts.
So back to the quote. I like it and it is true. Why did I mention my church group? Well a bunch of us were in a car going to the Bronx. I for once was not driving - woo hoo! I drive but I hate driving. Too many people have taken advantage of my kindness, car and driving, Anyway, “Geez, girl stay on the topic”, the quote.
We stopped at Dunkin Donuts first to get coffee. Well the driver did. I stayed in the car with the others. I wanted to put my seat straight up (I had shot-gun) because I hate it when it is leaning a bit back. I can’t tell if I am sitting or lying down and the uncertainty goes against all manners of just relaxing and enjoying the ride. So one of my younger jovenes helped me. It was a big project. I had to open my door, pull here, pull there, adjust and finally the seat was at the perfect angle (or not) that made me feel like we were going for a nice ride. The young person closes the door and an immense pain and rush of blood ran to the tip of my ring and middle finger. I had huge drops of tears rolling down my face as I stated in a slow and extremely articulated voice, "open the door quickly, and open the door now". The kid eventually heard me and as she opened the door she and another person was screaming to the top of their lungs as if their fingers were being crushed. The 4th person almost passed out. After the scare, the wiping of my tears and the driver returning, all was quite.
All of a sudden the person who screamed the loudest stated, "Letty I saw in your face that you were in extreme pain but you stayed calm and did not yell". I started to laugh. The kid who crushed my fingers kept saying, "I am so sorry, I am so sorry". The other person who almost passed out stated, "WOW, talk about calm in the midst of trial". Again I was cracking up. I told them I was in a lot of pain and that I all I wanted was my fingers to be free. Determination was my ammunition. That my message would get across was life or death. Talk about grace under pressure. If anyone has ever had their hand slammed with a car door, you surely understand that pressure -- literally.
Side note: my nails did not turn black and despite the slight tenderness in the fingers, I am fine and my nails look cute.
This reminded me of when my dad had a stroke while we were on vacation a few years back. I saw my dad sick and just said to him in a calm analytical voice, “Papi, I think you are having a stroke". But he could not talk and right before my eyes his mouth twisted down to the side and his arm got stiff. Then off course you know the running to the hospital and finding one near a beach resort is not that easy. When I got there I went straight to the window just to be pulled by a loud Jamaican lady cursing up a storm claiming that I cut her in “de line”. I let her scream as the in-take clerk observed. She was ranting and raving on how she had an emergency and that she was there first and I waited until she was done. When she was done I asked the clerk if I could speak and she nodded. I said in the most (again) articulate and slow speech, "My dad is in the middle of a stroke". I saw that clerk fly out of her chair and immediately place my dad on a stretcher as he was rolled into the emergency care area. I am glad I was there for my father.
Lesson: you get more flies with honey than with vinegar. A stroke is of the utmost importance, so you need to get that message across loud and clear.
I had my character attacked at different stages of my life. I think we all go through that. However, there was one time in my life that it was attacked so unjustly and so cruel. It was like a blow you never saw coming and it knocked the wind out of you. This punch was so hard that I lost ALL trust in fellow man. Assumptions and lies and rumors and such things definitely fade away when they are so stretched from reality. The other day I found this quote. Note sure who said it but here it goes, “Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are”.
When the smoke clears you can see everything. After a storm hits you see the debris on the beach. Though there is no more smoke and the garbage is cleaned up, you still feel a sense of need to yell at the top of your lungs, "I told you so! I told you so". But deep in your heart you feel the tug of God telling you "be still and know that I am". But you want to say something. You do not want to seem like a punk. The Holy Spirit brings to remembrance the biblical concepts and truth that He fights all of our battles and that He is like a mighty giant beside us fight along our side in each battle. You remember that the scripture states that He pulls you out of the miry clay (rumors), out of the deep pit (lies) and cleans you up and places you upon the rock (JESUS). God is the one who places a new song in our mouth and through that testimony, not your words or defense or debate or explanation or reasoning, but the testimony that God makes you experience, will be seen by many and lead them to come and truly know God and fear Him.
I sincerely did not know what to do in each case. I never had my fingers slammed. I never have seen a person go through a stroke. I never saw that storm come - it just hit. Yet, with God’s help I was able to behave in a manner that led me to figure out what to do (and what NOT to do).
I am still not perfect. Yet I am most definitely experiencing GRACE.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
I Get Kids! I really do.
I had such a beautiful day today. I woke up earlier than my nephews and sneaked onto their bed (the sofa bed in the living room) to wish them a good morning. Rare act for me because I am not a morning person. But you know what? Lately I have been having less and less "I am not a morning person" days. I am telling you, since my healing I see so many different things in my life. I think the prayers from those who were interceding for my healing were so abundant that they are still flowing in with blessings in my life.
Anyway, Itty Bitty was knocked-out. I was poking and touching his ears and his nose and all of the tickle spots but he would not wake up. Bubi his older brother stated that when he sleeps like that there is nothing to wake him. So I did what I do best. I gave him a snugly hug and said "Wake up Bitty, wake up!Tity is hungry and she wants to eat breakfast. If you do not wake up, I will eat you instead". Then Bitty gave a big stretch and opened his eyes. I quickly said, "Good morning baby face". And he said with the most biggest and sweetest smile, "Good morningTity". So after doing a kids devotional in English and in Spanish (per Grandma's specifications) and prayed we had breakfast.
This morning Bitty prayed in his own words. Don't get me wrong. He prays daily. But he prays by memory or by repeating what the adult is telling him to say. I started it off and said, "OK keep talking to Jesus". He said, "I can't". I said, "What do you mean you can't? Yes you can! Just tell Jesus what you always tell him but in you own words. Just mention the people as you remember them". He stared at me for a few seconds and carefully started to speak. He said a wonderful prayer and I could tell that he loves his family very much. We need to encourage kids to express in their own way what they feel in their heart to God. I hope I will be a good mom if I ever get to be one.
Later on we had breakfast as usual. Then the boys practice their musical instruments. Bubi was on the piano and he is doing an excellent job. He can sit for hours and hours and just play non-stop. Bitty on the other hand, hates practice. I did too when I was little. Grandma kept insisting in a very firm tone (not yelling) at him that he was not going to play on the computer unless he practices. She made him cry and well that was not going to motivate him at all to play his guitar. Now I have to be clear in that in no way was she being mean at all. She was playing the role of the strong and firm disciplinarian. He just sat quietly until his tears started to roll down his face. They both wanted to be heard but neither of them were listening. I proceeded to take him to the bathroom so he could tell me in "secret" what was wrong. See he and I are best friends so we tell each other secrets. He told me that he really did not want to practice. Duh, I knew that. But of course he was trying to tell grandma and she was not listening. Results were unproductive. My mother tried to stop me from what I was doing and I was very much annoyed. I told her, "I know what I am doing". She defended herself, "I know what I am doing too". I replied, "Let me do what I am doing. You want him to practice and I will get him to do that. He is too upset right now to do anything". She did not respond to that.
In the bathroom I spoke to Bitty and told him to go wash his face and cool off because if his Daddy saw him like that he would be sad. So he washed his faced and I got him to smile. I explained that he had to listen to grandma's wishes and that really there was no way he would be able to play in the computer if he did not play his guitar. I encouraged him to play 3 songs. He did exactly 3 songs. I looked away to laugh when he said he was done because I just knew he was gong to do that. I said he did a great job and convinced him to do a song that is one of my favorites that h
e plays. He got motivated and did just that and he got to play on the computer. We found a new game and he taught me how to play it. He is a 7 year old genius.Everybody wins, right? I do not know why my mother has such a hard time understanding that I understand Bitty. He shuts down like me when not being heard. I love my mom very much. She does so much for me. But I do not understand why she thinks I do not know how to deal with or discipline a child. I get kids. I really do. I wish she believed that too.
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